Do you wish you were an Oscar Mayer Wiener?

Is that what you truly wish to be?

Oscar Mayer is hiring "hotdoggers" (yes, that's the actual job title) for the upcoming year, with applications due on Jan. 31 for a one-year position beginning in June. Hired hotdoggers will "represent the Oscar Mayer brand as a goodwill ambassador" across the country -- in other words, you get to drive the Wienermobile around.

The job promises "a company car guaranteed to turn heads" in the understatement of the century.